Bedtime issues

We are still having trouble at bedtime. DS1 cries and even kicks when DH is holding him. When put in his crib, he cries and reaches out to be picked up. What's a parent to do? Finally, after a couple of 5 minutes crying in bed alone, and being held but still crying, I went into the bedroom too, and DS1 calmed down and was asleep in 5 minutes. The odd part is that I didn't hold, touch, or even talk to him. I just sat down (holding DS2) on the footstool by DH and DS1. DS1 saw me and stopped crying in less than a minute, and after a couple more minutes he was out cold.

His daycare provider says that it could be a stage of not wanting to miss anything else that is going on. And when he sees that we are all in there, then he knows he's not missing anything and will go to sleep. Also, having a standard bedtime routine (even if the time has to fluctuate based on our evening schedule) might help.